Tim Tebow jokes. I love Tim Tebow!

When Tim Tebow was denied an Egg McMuffin at McDonald's because it was 10:35, he threw a football at the store so hard it became a Wendy's. Tim Tebow has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoloy card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO. When it rains in the swamp Tim Tebow doesn't get wet. The rain gets Tim Tebow'd. A picture is worth a thousand words. A Tim Tebow is worth 1 billion words. Tim Tebow was once sleeping on his stomach when he got morning wood and struck oil. Tim Tebow CAN believe it's not butter. The recent earthquake off the coast of Florida measured 6.0 on the Richter scale, or .024 Tim Tebows. On his birthday, Tim Tebow randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun. Tim Tebow picked up the city of New Orleans with his pinky, and drained it. Newton's Third Law is wrong: Although it states that for each action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, there is no force equal in reaction to a Tim Tebow pass. Tim Tebow makes even Chuck Norris shit his pants. Tim Tebow's hand is the only hand that beats a Royal Flush. Tim Tebow smokes after sex. Not cigarettes, his penis literally smokes. If tapped, a Tim Tebow rush could power the country of Australia for 44 minutes. Tim Tebow can divide by zero. Tim Tebow has 12 moons. One of those moons is the Earth. Blood normally accounts for 13% of a person's total body weight... the other 87% of Tebow is badass.